1.
Me on shark tank: “it’s a bib for when you eat super crunchy toast that keeps all the crumbs from getting lost in your bra making your tits itchy for the rest of the day.” Mark Cuban: “...” Other male shark: “...” Finally a messy big titty lady shark: “10 million dollars”.
2.
it’s so hot 😩 i wish i could put my titties in a ponytail
3.
Relationship Status: Feeling up my own boobs and thinking, hey these are pretty awesome, I see what the fuss is about.
4.
ALL MY NON-BRA-WEARING FRIENDS LOOK AWAY (whispers) ok whoever's left, is there a technical term for when you have a Bra Incident and you end up with either smashboob or fourboob and you can't fix it right away is the word i'm looking for calamatitty
5.
Imagine going to jail for stealing 6 bras. https://t.co/Fn7JyDIAMH
6.
My right boob is named "Full House" and my left boob is named "Fuller House" :/
7.
I call my boobs Shrek 2 and Ocean's 12 because despite some promise both failed to live up to my expectations.
8.
Why did God create breasts if not for a natural shelf to place potato chips?
9.
I don't carry a wallet & I often put money inside my bra. At night when I undress, I pretend my boobs are paying me a ransom to be set free.
10.
Play with her boobs not her feelings
11.
In this unrelenting heat, my thoughts and prayers to all the large breasted women who are suffering from under boob sweat, bra chafing and the struggle to find pretty, lightweight tops that your tits can’t escape from.
12.
Push me aside, but I will come back. Hide me, but I will always emerge. I AM POWER. I AM RESILIENCE. I AM A BRA STRAP.
13.
Took off my bra and forgot what I was mad about
14.
A bra is just a jock strap for your chest balls
15.
Just slung my bra off & threw it to the other side of the couch where there are already 2 other bras. If my math is right, it's Wednesday.
16.
How sad for swimsuit designers that they've never seen or touched a human boob. I mean, I'm assuming.
17.
I wanted to feel liberated and empowered so I decided not to wear a bra tonight and now im paying for it from this painful bumpy uber ride
18.
I’m going to start a fashion app that allows you to filter instantly for “you can wear a normal bra with this dress” and it will make millions.
19.
Some days I feel pretty lousy about myself and then I remember I can take my bra off under my shirt like a sorcerer.